I wrote today a new refrain that was in my head.
I went to print my new found song, but crap the printer’s dead.
I changed the ink and pressed reset, but error now it said.
What’s this printer doing now? My paper has it shred.
So troubleshoot this dumb machine and this is what I read,
“Turn the printer on, and press again to send.”
“Turn the printer on!?!” To myself I said.
I wonder how “if off” it was, did my paper shred.
So off and on I turned again and pressed the button “send”.
What the heck is wrong with it? Ah, spooler overfed.
Again I turn it off and on, “print” to it I pled.
What the heck, it’s stuck in some process overhead.
On and Off, Off and On, my whole morning did I spend.
Angry I am, and losing ground, to this machine of dread.
Will I win this printer fight or lose all dignity instead?
My head feels like exploding and my face is turning red.
I give it one more try, print or else I threat.
I swear I heard it laugh at me then tell me go ahead.
I sat down and thought, “that’s great, my sanity has fled.”
For if the printer spoke to me I’m either crazy or I’m dead.
I give up and resign myself, my song will go unread.
To a state of angst and rage is where I have been led.
I throw this spawn of Satan’s glee off the window ledge.
I know it’s only noon, but I’m going back to bed.
Julie Hazlett, of South Bend, Indiana, creates art using many materials from tinted mica powders to special effects makeup. When not creating this art “officially,” she is driven to learn the things and whys of life and the world.